Geoff makes its way to the stage

I have to admit, I was beyond intimidated when Geoff arrived at my doorstep. Certain it was another dildo perfect for ‘at-home defense’, I couldn’t wait to review it.

Check it out HERE

Special thanks to Mr. Hankey’s Toys for sending this toy over to review!

Geoff arrives in style!

The package arrived at my door in a sturdy cardboard box, heavy and full of promise. I expected it to be substantial, especially since Geoff from Mr. Hankey’s Toys comes in just one size—and that size is not small. With an overall length of 12.75 inches, an insertable length of 11.75 inches, and a maximum circumference of 8.25 inches near the base, this is one sizable piece of silicone.

Despite its impressive size, Geoff isn’t flimsy. The weight of the toy is noticeable, and it has a top-heavy design, which causes it to droop downward when not supported. However, the base fits perfectly in a harness, making it compatible with several of Mr. Hankey’s custom-made harnesses designed for their larger toys. So, while the toy itself is massive, its design ensures it remains functional and manageable when used as intended.

It’s thick enough to sit on! Beyond that, because it’s body-safe silicone it can easily be cleaned and stored with other silicone toys.

Geoff has a sharply tapering head that quickly expands into a thick, substantial upper half. From there, the design reverses and gradually narrows until it reaches the flared base. This shape makes it ideal for someone who is already comfortable with larger items and seeks a fuller, more expansive experience. It’s particularly suited for individuals looking for a toy that offers maximum fullness and a substantial feel.

A dildo for serious size-lovers!

Given the toy’s drooping design, I wouldn’t recommend it for someone planning to use it in a harness. Even with a Vac-u-Hole, the droop makes it difficult to insert without additional support. The weight causes it to tilt downward, requiring you to lift it before insertion—something that’s much easier during personal use but less convenient when using a harness. On a positive note, the toy is easy to clean and comes in a variety of colors. Overall, Geoff is a unique and beautiful addition to my large collection, standing out with its distinctive design and impressive craftsmanship.

For the FULL review, watch the video below!