The Art of Approaching a Threesome
Sex Educator, Reviewer, Author, and Host of Open Bobs BB
Having a threesome is a fantasy for many
But it’s not as easy as grabbing the first person you find attractive and offering them a threesome. There are a lot of things to keep in mind when approaching your partner about this subject and ultimately working toward having a healthy threesome experience.
You can’t force it!
Bringing up something as complex as a threesome isn’t easy. Your partner could be uninterested in the idea of a three-way and not want to discuss the notion. This may not be something your partner will ever be okay with. You have to understand going into this that there’s a very real possibility your partner will not be interested in having sex with others and you have to respect their sexual boundaries regarding this.
If your partner does appear open to the idea of a threesome, then you can proceed with the conversation around it. Make sure you talk to your partner in a comfortable place while you are both open to having a conversation about such a personal and potentially vulnerable subject. Remember, this is not about your partner not being enough, this is just about your interest in introducing a new pleasure for both of you.
Make it a Safe experience
As I mentioned above, make it a safe space for both of you when you have this discussion. Don’t go out to the bars and fill your partner with alcohol with the hopes of the situation just…happening. This can be incredibly damaging to your relationship and sex life and the entire situation must be consensual. These topics need to be talked about SOBER and in a place that brings comfort to you both.
You’re asking about the potential of someone else sharing your bodies, do not treat this like something you must trick your partner into. Respect the seriousness of the topic.
What sex acts turn you on?
Before diving into that question you really want the answer to, try asking your partner what their fetishes are. What do they enjoy that they’ve perhaps been too shy to mention?
This opens the door for you to introduce your interests and provides you both with a sexually charged conversation. For some couples, coming clean about fetishes or sexual interests they haven’t shared is very erotic. Sexually educate yourself about your partner and their needs before expressing yourself regarding wanting a threesome. You may be surprised to find out they’ve been thinking about it, too!
Watch threesome porn!
Not only is enjoying threesome porn with your partner a great way to indulge in foreplay for you both, but you can also start envisioning another person in your fantasy. If your partner is not comfortable with porn, try reading erotica or talking your fantasies out loud once more.
You’re watching what you desire. Does it turn on your partner as well? Find a way to still see what they need from you and how you can work together to enhance your sex life and fantasies. Even if things don’t work out in your favor, you may learn quite a bit!
Want to bring toys into the bedroom as well? Read our guide!
