There is still a clear stigma around masturbation and self-pleasure

But it’s important to know that there’s nothing wrong with masturbating while you’re in a relationship. It’s not a personal attack against your partner. Your self love is not something that needs to end when you embark on a relationship.

YIKES! You Masturbate?

Gross! Disgusting! I can’t believe you have soiled my virgin ears with such talk!

Seriously, though. There seems to be some sort of ‘dirty’ stigma surrounding masturbation. Yet it feels like sex is not given that same reaction. “But WHY would you masturbate when your wife is right there, ready for sex?” It’s viewed as something personal against the person who is not being asked to come along. “Is it me? What’s wrong with me that masturbating feels better?”

It has nothing to do with the other partner. That’s the key thing here. Masturbation is about YOU. It’s about spending time with yourself, treating your body good, giving it the self care it needs, and exploring other sensations that you might otherwise be too shy to engage in right away. There’s nothing wrong with this healthy and fun act, it’s time to stop giving your partner a hard time about it.

That being said.

If masturbating is always getting in the way of that personal time between your partner and yourself…it’s time to spend more time pleasuring each other. Masturbation is healthy and should be a welcomed act but should never replace sex in a relationship.

It’s healthy!

Seriously. I know I mentioned this up above but repeat after me…masturbation is healthy! Not only does it have numerous physical health benefits but it also has quite a few psychological ones. Orgasming releases oxytocin and dopamine in the brain, leaving you feeling happy and satisfied. If your partner is not in the mood or you are interested in giving yourself a pat on the back, this is a fantastic way to get an all-natural chemical ‘up’ reaction!

Know yourself better

Remember, your relationship may be a partnership but that does not mean you aren’t both separate people. Having alone time with yourself is incredibly important and having alone time with your body can both boost your self-confidence and enhance your understanding of your body. You have the confidence in that alone time to explore sensations and different things you wouldn’t otherwise explore.

By doing so, you’ll be able to direct your partner to better satisfy you! Think of it as one of the best damn study sessions you’ve ever had. FOR SCIENCE!

So light a candle, grab your favorite masturbator or dildo, and get to studying!

Curious about all the ways masturbation helps the body and mind? Read our guide!