How to Keep it Spicy in a Long-Distance Relationship

Bella Trix

Bella is a romance author fascinated by sex history, mythology, and novelty toys. 

When “long distance” is added to a relationship, it causes a shift

This is a shift in how we connect, communicate, and pleasure each other. You may be wondering, why self-inflict yourself with a dry spell? Well in this day and age, the absence of your partner doesn’t have to bring cause for a drought. Rather it can be a fun, creative, and erotic experience for both people.

Sure self-pleasure is one thing, but how do you keep the spark alive and connect sexually while in different cities or parts of the world? This presents some interesting challenges. However, it has allowed us to explore our relationship in a new way. 

Fun things to try in a long-distance relationship

1. Sexy & regular care packages –

This is a big category. Send your partner a package with some random things, both sexual and non-sexual. Include sexy things like lingerie, masturbation sleeves, and lube. Sometimes it is fun to take some sexy photos of yourself and include the print-outs in the package as a surprise! 

2. Sexting –

Be careful which apps you decide to send naughty messages through. There are some that have it against their TOS to send nudity or suggestive content. Still, once you navigate where you are sexting, don’t be afraid to send your partner random sensual messages. Many partners find it exciting and fun to start written erotic roleplays with each other to keep things spicy and new! (Try acting them out when you’re back together again!)

3. Sexy to-dos –

Something else you and your partner can explore is a sexy to-do list. Give each other a specific time of day when they need to cum or how they should play with themselves. You can also start to compile a sex bucket list of things to do the next time you are together such as different positions and locations to try having sex.

4. Using Bluetooth-enabled toys –

Grabbing a Bluetooth-enabled sex toy allows you both to connect and navigate playing with each other long-distance. These toys are easily connectable and your partner has control over speed or intensity! Try sexting while you play (most toys with apps have a private chat room with your partner!). 

Looking for some great options? Here’s my favorite! 

5. Sending erotic stories or videos –

Try sending each other stories about things you want to explore sexually, about things you’ve enjoyed together, or just random things that turn you on. The visual element is a great way to start some foreplay or fuel your own private masturbation time while also keeping you connected to your long-distance partner. 

More to try:

  • Make a replica of your genitals to send!

  • Watch the same porn at the same time

  • Make a sex music playlist

  • Send a gift card to a local sex shop

There are so many things you can try to spice up your long-distance relationship.  As you explore this new state of your relationship even more, I’m sure you’ll find some more things to explore and try out together. Talk about what you enjoy and make sure to incorporate it into your efforts with each other. 

Enjoy!